Solo travel can be beautiful, freeing and wildly fun. It can also feel unexpectedly lonely. And that doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong.
Maybe you’re sitting at a gorgeous restaurant with an amazing view, and instead of glowing, you just want to cry. It’s confusing. You might think, what is wrong with me?
Nothing. We hear about this moment all the time. SoFe started as a community of solo female travelers, now 580k+ women strong, and loneliness on the road is one of the things members talk about most. It’s a big part of why we run small group trips for women today.
So this is for those moments: why they happen, what they don’t mean, and what actually helps.
Sometimes it's not loneliness. It's missing a witness.
One SoFe traveler put it this way:
“I love travelling solo, but there have been times when I wished I’d had someone there to just stand next to while I stare in awe.” A SoFe traveler
If that sounds familiar, you’re in good company. When we asked women in our community about this, one thing came through loud and clear: so many have felt it. On beaches, on buses, at dinner, and in the middle of trips they’d dreamed about for years.
Why it hits so hard
At home, life is noisy. Work, family, group chats and a million little things pull at your attention. Travel strips most of that away, and when you finally slow down, the feelings you’ve been carrying get room to speak.
Beauty does it too. A sunrise or a perfect little street can open you up, and joy isn’t the only thing that comes through. Sometimes it’s grief, or longing, or the ache of wanting someone there.
And sometimes what feels like loneliness is really something else: fatigue, overstimulation, homesickness, or the weight of being the only one making every decision.
What it doesn't mean
Feeling lonely on a solo trip doesn’t mean you’re not independent enough, that you should have stayed home, or that the whole trip is ruined. A hard afternoon isn’t a failed trip.
Often the loneliness isn’t even the worst part. It’s what comes after: feeling embarrassed for being lonely, then guilty for not feeling grateful somewhere beautiful. That extra layer is what turns a passing wave into a spiral. Try not to do that to yourself.
What actually helps
Let yourself feel it. Cry if you need to. Go back to your room, journal, take a walk. You’re allowed to feel sad in Bali. Feelings usually pass faster when you stop fighting them, so remind yourself this is a moment, not the whole trip.
Get around people, without pressure. You don’t need a deep connection, just some human energy. Sit at the bar instead of a table, join a walking tour or a cooking class, or find a busy café. A short chat with a guide or a bartender can reset your whole mood.
Reach out to someone who knows you. Text a friend, send a photo to someone who’d love the view, or leave a voice note. Nobody back home can fix the feeling, but being seen helps.
Move your body. A walk, a swim, a stretch in your room. The point isn’t a wellness moment. It’s helping the feeling move.
Make one small plan. Don’t ask how to save the trip. Ask what one small thing would help right now. Dessert, a sunset spot, a massage, or booking something for tomorrow.
Ask what it’s really about. Am I lonely, or tired? Am I missing a person, or just someone to share this with? Is this about the trip, or something bigger in my life? You don’t need a dramatic answer, just an honest one.
Remember that alone isn’t lonely. You can be alone and peaceful, alone and powerful, alone and wildly happy. Your own company isn’t a problem to solve.
Why some women build community into solo travel
This is why so many women love a hybrid style of travel: independent enough to still feel like themselves, supported enough not to carry every moment alone.
On a small group trip, you still get the confidence of doing something brave for yourself. You also get people to share meals with, someone to turn to and say “look at that,” and fewer decisions to make on your own. Our groups are capped at 14 women, and almost everyone comes alone.
A traveler on our Ecuador trip described it this way:
“I instantly felt like I gained a community of friends. I also felt very seen.” A SoFe traveler
It’s not that group travel is better than going solo. It’s a different kind of amazing, and plenty of our travelers do both. If you’re weighing it up, our honest guide to whether women-only group tours are worth it is a good place to start.
When it's more than a wave
Sometimes solo travel loneliness is just a wave. Sometimes it feels heavier. If you feel deeply distressed, overwhelmed or unsafe with your thoughts, please reach out for support right away. In the U.S. or Canada, you can call or text 988. Elsewhere, Befrienders Worldwide can help you find a local crisis line. There’s no prize for white-knuckling your way through pain.
You don't have to carry every moment alone
A wave of loneliness doesn’t erase your trip, or your bravery. It’s part of what solo travel teaches: that you can feel the hard thing, move through it, and keep going.
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And if you’d like your next adventure to come with people to share it with, come travel with us. See where we are going next.